At one point or the other, we have all said to ourselves, “Why does my life suck?”. Why do I have to suffer so much?”. We have all been through the lowest of the lows and we have all faced despair.
It sometimes becomes so overwhelming that we cannot seem to move forward. So once again, the question here is “Why does my life suck?”.
The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it.– Eckhart Tolle
5 Reasons to Feel ‘Why Does My Life Suck?’
The reasons why life sometimes sucks can be many. Maybe your relationships have not been so rosy, or maybe you are unable to change your job. Or worse, the political situation around you is completely haphazard. Whatever it is, we know that disappointment is deep-rooted in a lot of things.
Let us have a look at some of the reasons why life sometimes sucks.
1. Things do not go as per your expectations
The moment you go about enjoying life, it suddenly starts giving you a tough time. You wish for “X”, life gives you “Z”. Your expectations are left unfulfilled. It is as simple as that.
2. You undergo a lot of suffering
Sometimes suffering is due to unwanted and painful situations in personal life. A loss of a close one, a long term illness or financial losses beyond recovery. All of this leads to a very difficult period in your life.
3. Uncontrollable things shape your life
You sometimes feel that all the bad things happen to you. Bad debts, suspended from school, worst weather ever, transfer to another city, theft, Phew! It seems that none of your plans work and life has it all planned for you in the worst possible way.
4. You have lost the will to live
You no longer feel like getting up every morning and doing anything. Even the things that once excited you, no longer hold the charm. You have completely buried yourself in the hopelessness of the very life.
5. You hate what you do for a living
Life definitely seems to suck when your job is just not meant for you. You hate going to your workplace. You can’t stand your colleagues. And you just cannot find the strength to quit it at this moment.
While there can be a multitude of other reasons, the fact that we hold the key to a better life is absolutely true.
20 Things To Do When You Feel ‘Why Does My Life Suck?’
Life will always be a display of different shades at different times. It is the yin and yang of life that teaches us the best of both worlds. When we begin to understand the situations and take personal responsibility for things, the scenario changes.
So take a deep breath and look at the brighter side of life with the following tips:
1. Realize the Power of Now
All the negative feelings arise from some form of negative emotions like fear, anxiety, worry, resentment, etc. The feelings are defined either by thinking about the past or worrying about the future.
The only precious moment in your life is the present moment. Worrying or grieving won’t change the past or future. What can change is now and we should focus more on the present than any other time.
2. Awaken your Consciousness
What is consciousness in simple terms? It is the awareness of existence. Being self-aware and mindful of your surroundings is consciousness. The first step is to start watching your thoughts as they appear.
It will take some practice. But once you begin to watch your thoughts impartially, you will understand yourself better. This practice can do wonders to heighten your spiritual senses and understanding what truly matters.
3. Let Go
It is said that whatever you resist, persists. Resistance creates suffering and confusion. As long as you are resisting, you are blocking the flow of life. When things do not seem to be working, let go of it. Let go of your inner dependency towards a certain outcome. Take life as it comes and knows that everything is impermanent.
4. Understand the Impermanence of Things
Everything that we see or experience is constantly changing. Be it relationships, your body, possessions or adventures, nothing lasts forever. So, when you relate your suffering to any of the circumstances, understand that nothing is permanent.
Learn to differentiate between what is real and what is projected by our minds. Happiness lies within. In other words, no impermanent phenomena can impart happiness on a permanent basis.
5. Expect less, live more
All of us have heard the phrase “Expectation is the root cause of disappointment.” While you tend to expect people, situations or yourself, it is unlikely that things go in the same way.
The gap between expectation and reality is what causes trouble. Life, as we know it, is full of good and bad times. So, let us practice acceptance of the present and take inspired action for a better tomorrow.
6. Count your blessings
More often than not, we are highly ungrateful for what we have. We forget that there are people who are far less fortunate than us. There are people who struggle for three meals a day.
Similarly, there are millions of unemployed in the country. So, why not count our blessings for what we have instead? Also, be grateful for the tough times as, without them, you wouldn’t have learned so much.
7. Indulge in your favorite activities
Whenever you start to feel gloomy, try engaging in activities that you love. When you feel like your life sucks, start living the life of your dreams. Eat good food, roam around, listen to your favorite music, dance away the sadness and do what makes you happy. Do what you love and take it one day at a time.
8. Get out of the shell
If you’ve resorted to your own shell, it is very important to get out of it. It may seem impossible at first, but you will feel much better by distracting your mind with something else. Resorting to your own shell forces one to constantly think about the upsetting situations. This hardly helps.
Be considerate about the personal space of people. If someone wants to be alone for a while, let them be. Do not force them to come out of it. If this has been happening for too long, try talking to them. Sometimes, people only need you to be around and listen to them when they feel like it. Do not push your opinion on someone who’s not open to it.
9. Seek help from family or friends
Sometimes, talking about your problems with close ones can help relieve the pain. Do not shy away from talking about your troubles with someone you trust. You would be amazed at how easy it was to pull yourself out of the victim loop. Similarly, you can also seek help in keeping a check on you from time to time.
Whenever you come across someone who is extremely disappointed and upset with life, please be mindful of what you say. The person may be dealing with depression and mere words might not help. Try to read more about how to help a person with depression.
10. Surround yourself with positive people
Have you ever noticed that being surrounded by negative people causes more negativity in your life? For example, when your office colleagues crib about the workplace on a daily basis, you tend to hate it too. This is because your mind gets conditioned to think in that particular way.
Your personal choice gets tampered with unconscious ways. Try to surround yourself with people who think and speak positively. Make conscious efforts to be in positive situations and choose sanity over insanity.
11. Write it down
The period of struggle has the most to offer in terms of learning. You may not realize it at that moment; however, you come out a lot stronger than before after such times.
Writing about your struggle can amazingly help in sorting things out. Additionally, it sometimes helps in gaining better clarity about the situation. Writing things can help your mind organize things like never before.
12. Break it down
If it is a big problem, break it down into small pieces and pick one at a time. Do not try to solve the whole problem in one go. Rearrange the way you look at it. In this process, you might realize that some problems are not that problematic after all.
13. Trust the power of Mind
When life sucks, you often give in to surviving rather than living. You cling to mediocrity because doing something new might result in failure. However, we must know that a mind is an excellent tool if used correctly.
The mind can be trained to rise above the complexities and observe the positive more than the negative. To understand the power, try practicing meditation and awareness to activate the dull mind.
14. Stop the Blame Game
Putting the blame on someone is a lot easier than taking responsibility. While the external factors may be uncontrollable, blaming things will never open a secret door for you. When you constantly crib about situations and blame the world, you are more likely to feel a lot worse than before.
Instead, take ownership of your life situation, however, it may be. The next time you say “Life has always been unfair to me.” or “My life always sucks.” ask yourself, what is life after all? Life is what you make of it. Good or bad, rich or poor, worthy or unworthy. You steer the wheel and you take it forward.
15. Stop Comparing
Yes, it all looks rosy and dreamy from the outside. When your social media peers post pictures of their latest accomplishments and adventures, you wonder what has gone wrong for you. It is easy to spiral down the rabbit hole of comparison; especially when everything seems perfect outside.
But it is highly dangerous. Each one of us lives differently, thinks differently and chooses differently. Comparison is highly delusional and it should in no way affect your peace of mind.
16. Be open to new experiences
Yes, you do not want to get out of bed. And you definitely do not want to try ice-skating. It’s all so gloomy and lifeless and life sucks right now.
We’ve all been there in the shallow pits of life. Coming out of it takes a lot of strength.
However, when you come out of your shell and learn new things, you understand that life is so much more than misery. The underlying paranoia about new things gets shattered the moment you try those things.
17. Create Back-up plans
Just as a back-up is extremely necessary for your important data, a back-up plan for life is never a bad idea. Sometimes, even after putting in your 100%, things do not work in your favor.
At such times, a back-up plan always helps. Do not obsess over it; however, be ready for all the contingencies. Expecting things to always function the way we want is going to disappoint us at some point or the other.
18. Change your routine
Whenever you feel like your life sucks, try to shuffle up your routine. It acts as a distraction from the fixed pattern of overthinking. Include a bit of exercise in your day. Try to prepare exciting and healthy meals for yourself. Rather than spending hours of negative contemplation in your bed, why not do something fun and interesting? Think about it.
19. Read (A LOT!)
The benefits of reading as therapy are truly underrated. Reading has been proven to provide the mind with the necessary stimulation and nourishment it needs. It broadens your mental and intellectual horizons, thereby activating your self-confidence. It does not necessarily need to be heavy, a light reading is equally refreshing for your brain.
Start with 15 minutes a day. Read anything that interests you and grabs your attention. It can be a great self-help book or articles in magazines. Give your mind a break from thinking by reading about a zillion other things in life.
20. Never Give up
This falls into the box of the most cliché tips ever. However, this is the most relevant one. Whatever you do, just remember that trying makes it a lot easier with time. The worries will melt away. There will be happy times again. In fact, you are constantly surrounded by the invisible realms of happiness; invisible only if you choose not to see it. Not giving up is winning the fight already.
Do not give up, for every second of battle teaches you a lot more than anything in life.
“Why does my life suck” is sometimes a matter of choice. No matter how adverse the situation is, you can always remind yourself of the impermanence of things. In other words, try shifting your focus and perspective towards the positive aspects of life. You will eventually and definitely land at a better place.
Bhanushree is a part-time freelance writer working full-time in the area of corporate law. Being more on the reclusive side, she finds writing as a perfect way to channelize her thoughts. She’s an explorer by heart and loves to pen down anything that interests her. Her favorite topics are psychology, spirituality, lifestyle, travel, and food. She aims to touch as many lives as possible through her articles for TheMindfool.