Fake friends can lead to heartbreaking relationships. This is because an individual invests time in nurturing them but when the time comes, they are the first ones to jump off the boat! Shocking but true. Good friends are exactly the opposite. They can also feel bad when you say something that hurts.
Fake people may stop talking to you but a true friend will always be by your side when the situation demands. Interestingly, we choose our friends, therefore it is very important to keep a lookout for fake friendships. They are like toxic relationship-damaging your physical and mental health. Unlike healthy relationships, fake friends only stick around in good time.
Fake Friends Definition
SUMMARY
A fake friend is someone who pretends to be your friend but he or she just uses you for their benefit.
Every friend who is not in the above category is a fake friend. But one of the best ways to understand this concept is through an example. Say an individual receives a call from a long lost friend. Now, this is someone that the individual has never spoken to in the last five or maybe ten years.
So why did the call come today? After the casual exchange of pleasantries, this long lost friend quickly asks you for a favor.
Apparently, he is moving houses and needs your help with the shifting of luggage. The individual may choose to help or steer clear from the proposal. But before that, he or she needs to ask themselves if this person is a true friend.
In most cases, this would be a long lost friend trying to milk an opportunity in the form of friendship. There are many such instances in life when you will come across fake friends like these.
These false friends will pretend just like the real ones do. The sole differentiating factor that will point them out is their ability to abandon you in your hour of need. A friend who stands with you in your darkest hours is a real friend. The others around you are more like acquaintances that will fade away over a period of time.
Also, fake friends are so obsessed with themselves that they invest very little time in nurturing the friendship with you. They are more interested to fulfil their needs and will go to any extent to do so, even risk breaking your heart.
10 Signs of a Fake Friend
A true friend is like the icing on the cake. You love to eat a spoonful, even when the tummy is full! He or she will never spread a rumor about you.
But a fake friend is the exact opposite. He may not be a bad person. The fake friend is like the extra sugar that you don’t need and it ultimately ends up ruining the cake entirely. So in this section, we will tell you how to spot a fake friend.
Here are 10 signs to spot a fake friend in your circle
1. Behavior is the key
Human behavior is the key to unlocking a lot of secrets including fake friendship. Even in your friend circle, look at the behavior of your friends to spot a fake one. If you come across someone who regularly disappoints you, there you have it. He or she is a fake friend.
2. Fake friends are obsessed with themselves
Fake friends don a mask. They love to talk about themselves. For them, the world is all about ‘me’. If someone in the group loves to talk about themselves and cannot stop talking or harping, he or she is a fake friend. They love to have an audience. This clearly means that they do not need a friend.
3. Fake friends are uncaring
Real friends love you and always care for you. The fake ones do not. They will be the last to notice if you are under pressure or need any help. If you need help, they will be the last ones to offer it. If something goes wrong, they are the first ones to point fingers and will want everyone else to apologize.
4. Fake friends will never encourage you
A false friend will never encourage you to do anything. Even when you are good at something or have the capability to excel, they will hold you back. According to them, you are incapable of achieving even the slightest improvement in your life.
5. They believe they are perfect
Yes! This is a constant issue with fake friends. Real friends accept you with your flaws just like you accept them. After all, every individual has some unique identifying traits. But the fake ones think that they are perfect.
6. Fake friends love to send you on a guilt trip
Guilt-tripping does not happen when you are with real friends. This is because real friends understand your time and respect your priorities. If you do not find the time to call them or can’t spend time, they will not feel bad. But fake friends will love to send you guilt-tripping for every such occasion.
7. Your promotion will make fake friend jealous
Good friends have no space for jealousy. If you are happy, they will share your happiness and when you are sad, they will give you a shoulder to lean on. But fake friends are jealous of your promotion at any step in life.
8. They will not respect your boundaries
Real friends understand and appreciate your boundaries. But fake ones will downright disrespect it. No matter how many boundaries you set, they will overrule it.
9. Fake friends are never available for a conversation
Sometimes you need a friend just to talk. There is so much that happens but the heart holds it all up. When you are in the company of a true friend, you can bare your heart out and it will make you feel better. But fake friends will never spare the time for such a conversation.
10. They can’t keep a secret
Fake friends love to gossip. One of the best ways to check for them is to share a secret with them. Sooner or later, that secret will end up becoming the hottest gossip of the batch. All this because your fake friends will find it difficult to seal his lips.
Who Are Real Friends?
We all yearn for friendship. The minute a kid steps out from the house, the first thing he or she looks for is the companionship of friends. This need motivates him to make friends. In simple terms, someone who stands by you in your hour of need is called a friend. Friends make you feel good.
They give you the comfort of watching your back at all times. Often, a close friend is a bigger confidant than relatives or family. This is because we find it easier to speak our hearts out to real friends.
A good friend can come from any category. He or she can be rich or poor. They may or may not belong to the same age group. These friends accept you just the way you are. They do not ask you to change your way of working or living.
Also, making friends does not require any special talent. For some of us, talking to others is a challenge. But even the introverts find a way to make friends.
Fake friends vs Real friends
Here are eight key differences between a fake friend and a real friend
1. A fake friend will never support you. Contrastingly, the real friend will always stand by you, no matter what you decide to do.
2. A real friend will understand your personality and accept you for what you are. The fake friend will always look for flaws in your personality. In the long run, this hampers your mental development.
3. Fake friends expect you to always make an apology. However, real friends will forgive you even before you ask for it.
4. Real friends will take efforts to stay in touch with you but the fake ones will not even bother to update your contact details. Fake friends will only contact you when they need you.
5. If you have a real friend, he or she will encourage you to explore your interests. The fake friend will not even want to talk about your personal interests.
6. A genuine friend will always have time for you. The fake friend will only look for ways to avoid spending time with you.
7. With fake friends, you always struggle to live up to expectations. Backhanded compliments are also a norm for fake friends. But with real friends, there is no such challenge.
8. Fake friendship feels like a parasitic relationship where the other person is just using you. A real friendship is a mutually beneficial association where both friends get to savor the fruits of a healthy and happy relationship.
What Can You Do About Fake Friends?
The worst part of a fake friend is that they radiate a lot of negativity. This negative energy takes a toll on your health as well-both physical and mental. The false friend in your circle can ruin all the positivity that the real friends can pass on to each other.
So, if you have a fake friend in your group, keep your eyes open and spot them. The sooner you get rid of them, the quicker you can retain sanity in your healthy relationships.
How To Deal with Your Fake Friends and Move On?
Unlike real friends, fake ones will never support you. If you can’t be yourself in front of someone, he or she is a fake friend. They make you conscious. You start being careful of who you are. Remember that not every friend is a fake friend.
Some of them are genuine buddies. They will stand by you in challenging times, stand with you in pleasure and pain. However, if you do come across a fake friend, you need to quickly drop them and move on. The longer you take; the more damage it can cause to your mental health.
Many of us feel guilty when a friendship falls apart. Incase of fake friends, don’t fall for this trap. Because you need to get rid of them. Here are a few tips on how you can move away from them:
1. Minimize contact with Fake friends
Once you have identified a fake friend, try and reduce your contact with them as much as possible. When the frequency of the conversation will reduce, they will get the hint. Also, since this happens gradually, it will be easier for you to disconnect yourself from the relationship.
2. Set clear personal boundaries while dealing with Fake friends
Fake friends love to invade your personal space. Initially one tends to ignore the invasion because it looks like a real friendship. But it soon becomes irritating. When you identify fake friends, draw clear personal boundaries, and make it known to them. If you are offended by their invasion, voice your opinion.
3. Steer clear from codependency
When a person is a fake friend, he or she loves to dump the onus of maintaining the relationship on you. In such cases, you need to be firm and voice your discontent. Avoid taking their responsibilities unless it is absolutely necessary.
4. Practice distancing from Fake friends
Avoid a get together with fake friends. They will use you as an emotional outlet. You need to stay away from such situations to maintain the sanity of your mental health. Also, hours with fake friends feel depressing while just a few minutes with a real one adds a zest of positivity.
5. Remind yourself why you need to stay away from Fake friends
Analyze the behavior of your friends on a daily basis. This will help you reaffirm your belief in genuine friendship and stay away from the fake ones. You do not need to spend more than a few minutes daily for this activity.
6. Engage in self love
Unfortunately, fake friends take you away from yourself. They always manipulate you for their benefits. One of the best ways to steer clear from them is to engage in activities that promote self-love. This could be anything –yoga, meditation, listening to music, dancing, etc.
7. Make real friends
Fake friendships can be depressing. But that does not mean you should give up. One should not stop looking for genuine friendships. Go ahead and make a new real friend. Let the friendship blossom in due course.
8. Enjoy the freedom
Fake friends add to the burden in any relationship. As one gets rid of them or distances themselves, he or she will experience a sense of freedom. Imagine no one is clinging on to you! Sounds so relaxing, doesn’t it? So, enjoy the freedom and treasure it.
Songs about Fake Friends
If you are experiencing a situation where you struggling to deal with your fake friends in your life then here is a list of songs to resonate with –
1. Tate McRae – All my Friends are Fake (Lyrics)
2. Bebe Rexha – FFF “Fuck Fake Friends” (Lyrics)
3. Camila Cabello – Real Friends (Lyrics)
4. Nightcore – All My Friends Are Fake – Lyrics
5. Ivey Meeks – Fake Friends (Music Video) | Ooh Ooh Remix
Fake Friends Quotes
While we have explained the subject of fake friendship in great detail, here are some ‘two faced fake friends quotes’ that leave a lasting impression.
1. ‘Be very careful of who you share your problem with, remember that not every friend that smiles at you is your best friend’
– Kemmy Nola
2. ‘A false friend and a shadow attend only while the sun shines’
– Benjamin Franklin
3. ‘You got nothing to lose. You don’t lose when you lose fake friends’
– Joan Jett
4. ‘A friend who stands with you in pressure is more valuable than a hundred ones who stand with you in pleasure’
– Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton
5. ‘Buy a gift for a dog, and you’ll be amazed at the way it will dance and swerve its tail, but if don’t have anything to offer to it, it won’t even recognize your arrival; such are the attributes of fake friends’
– Michael Bassey Johnson
6. ‘If they talk about other people with you, they will talk about you with other people’
– Carlos Wallace
7. ‘Fake friends are like shadows: always near you at your brightest moments, but nowhere to be seen at your darkest hour. True friends are like stars, you don’t always see them but they are always there’
– Habeeb Akande
8. ‘Friendship is delicate as a glass, once broken it can be fixed but there will always be cracks’
– Waqar Ahmed
9. ‘Letting go of toxic people in your life is a big step in loving yourself’
– Hussein Nishah
10. ‘A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down’
– Arnold H. Glasow
Fake Friends Memes
Conclusion
Fake friendship never leads to a happy ending. It is an emotional burden that you will have to carry. The increasing co-dependency will take a toll on your self confidence.
Therefore, it is best to avoid such friends or get rid of them at the first available opportunity. You need not have a nasty fight. Simple distancing measures should work just fine. Always remember that only good friends will help you evolve into a better person.
A freelancer by profession, Kavita writes on a variety of topics, mental health being one of her favorites. Fond of traveling, socializing and meeting new people, most of her inspiration for writing comes from real-life scenarios as well as experiences. Her motto in life has always been to look for a reason to smile.