Almost every human being in the world seeks love – the kind that is unconditional, giving, and eternal. When you meet someone with an ability to love you like no other, people say that it was destined to be. And, when you separate from someone you have been with, they say ‘he/she wasn’t the one’. According to popular Asian fables, the legendary ‘red string of fate’ or ‘red thread of fate’ is anything but a myth.
Most people, especially the previous generation, like to believe that there is someone for everyone. And, that it is a matter of right time and right place that you meet the one who is meant for you. People who believe in the myth, the red thread of fate say that you can be with several people in your life, but the one you are destined to meet and spend our life with is pre-decided.
What is the Legend of The Red String of Fate?
Japanese legend says that everyone is tied to their soulmate via a red string on their pinky finger. It doesn’t matter where we are born or what our circumstances are, people tied to each other with this string will find each other.
According to an ancient Japanese legend, the gods tie an invisible red thread to the pinky finger of two people who are bound to find each other in life. And, irrespective of where each of them is born, lived or any other circumstances, they would definitely meet each other to spend a life together. The legend says that no matter how much you stretch or tangle the invisible red string; but it can never be broken.
Another popular Chinese legend talks about the red thread of fate, according to which the lunar matchmaker god, Yuè Lǎo (月老), also known as the charge of marriages, is also the charge of the red thread of fate.
He is responsible for tying an invisible red string to the ankles of two people who are predestined to be each other’s soul mates. Much like the Japanese legend, no matter where these people are born, who they become, and what circumstances they face, they will come together and live a lifetime.
The red string of fate in other cultures
There are several other cultures around the world who speak of the same belief. People living in the west know it as the belief of having a ‘soul mate’, a ‘twin soul or a ‘twin flame’. Some know it as the famous western concept of promising by connecting the inky fingers. And, others give in to the notion that you cannot help falling in love with someone since it has all been written in the stars even before you were born.
Interestingly, the legend is not only true for lovers. The Japanese believe that the thread connects any two people who are bound to affect each other’s lives in one way or the other.
What is the Twin Soul Connection?
According to this concept, there are three types of soulmates, and that the connection between them can be instant.
The connection between twin souls is instant. Irrespective of time, place, and situations, these souls share a bond that can wither any test. More often than not, the twin souls come across each other at the early stages of their existence. However, due to various reasons, they could be moved apart. During the initial encounter, one soul often feels the spiritual connection while the other doesn’t.
Sometimes, the twin souls are just people connected forever, however, other times they may be forced apart to live separate lives, fulfil separate spiritual goals, and experience other (unsuccessful) relationships before fate brings them back together again.
But you may wonder ‘are these souls bound by destiny to find each other?’ The short answer is ‘yes’. However, the explanation of how it works sometimes could be complicated. It suffices to say that every now and then, one of the souls ends up feeling more intensely than the other.
Even though the latter feels the connection, they refuse to give in due to either their past failed relationships or present situations. It takes a lot of suffering, bereavement, and pain before they realize that they are better together than apart.
Sometimes, it is difficult to understand why, irrespective of all the love and connection, your twin soul may try to make a run. Studies show that ego resistance and emotional pressure are two of the most common reasons for such behavior. However, it is important to understand that it is not a personal rejection of you.
The Difference Between Twin Souls and Twin Flames
There are two opinions about whether the two concepts are same or not. One school of thought believes that there is no difference, while the other opines that unlike twin souls, twin flames may be involved with each other romantically.
Speaking of soul mates, a lot of people use the terms ‘twin flame’ and ‘twin soul’ when talking about human connections. Surprisingly, there are two schools of thought regarding the similarity between the two notions. While one school of thought believes that a ‘twin soul’ is just another word for ‘twin flame’, others like to elaborate an intricate differences between the two concepts.
According to some, the primary difference between twin souls and twin flames is the fact that the former ways indicates two human souls who are romantically involved with each other. These souls are brought together to carry on their spiritual journey with one another.
On the other hand, twin flames may or may not be romantically involved. It is believed that twin flames are originally an entire soul, who are divided to be reunited at a later stage to serve some divine purpose together. The twin flames may serve as soul mates for others.
3 Different Types of Soulmates
Soul mates are broadly classified into three categories:
- The usual soul mate who you meet without much effort, and they often make you feel like you have known them forever.
- The karmic soul mate who doesn’t necessarily have to be someone you like or love. They come into your life more like a life lesson. Their presence in your life is to teach you something or make you stronger, even if it causes you to excruciating emotional pain at the moment.
- And, finally, the twin soul (who, despite what happens, stays connected to you for an entire lifetime.
How True is The Red Thread of Fate?
Some people tend to dismiss the theory, but there is certainly some truth to it. We all meet people who feel connected to us in strange ways, whether it is partners or friends. Therefore, the theory may not be true in its entirety, but the legend does have some elements of reality.
Myth or not, it is true that we meet and share bonds with several people in our lifetime, but the ones we connect with and stay with for a lifetime are a handful. For instance, ask yourself about how many friends you have made since you were a child. And, now count the ones that you still call a friend till date. Not many, are they?
To understand the reality of the red thread of fate, you must understand the fundamental essence of the legend. As the Japanese legend explains, the string isn’t only meant for romantic partners. It includes anyone and everyone who is supposed to help each other or touch each other’s lives in some way. This is why, in many cultures, youngsters are known to promise things to one another by a ‘pinky swear’.
There are several real life stories that have been documented by people who experienced the red string of fate. These stories have been told by people who met their respective partners in strange, unexpected manners. Some of these documented journals also question the fundamentals of twin souls, however, a detailed study of these stories may help strengthen your belief in the concept.
6 Steps to Prepare Yourself for Your Red String of Fate
To help yourself recognize when the string of fate may be at work, you need to first learn how to differentiate love from fear. You also know need to know and love yourself, and start being more kind towards others.
A lot of people relate ‘fate’ with a fear of something uncontrollable. For them, fate is something they have no power over. It is the ultimate, and it is doomed to happen. So much so that when something bad happens, they give in to the situation thinking it was their destiny to suffer. But what if you could look at fate positively?
To find the other end of your red thread of fate can be extremely intriguing. But it is important that you prepare yourself in advance for it. Preparing yourself for your red string of fate mostly encompasses bringing a positive outlook to your life. However, the following suggestions will help you better in shaping that outlook:
1. Do not mistake fear for love
As strange as it may sound, fear can often cloak itself as love and trick you. If you feel that you constantly need someone else to approve of you, or to show love, or that your happiness depended on someone else, that is not loving. That is fear. Love is when you can be grateful for what your partner offers you. When two people are truly in love, they not only respect each other but also help each other in being the best version of themselves.
2. Appreciate yourself
You need to love yourself first for others to love you. At the same time, if you don’t appreciate yourself or don’t feel happy about who you are, you won’t be able to spread joy around you. If you are constantly grumpy, negative, and low, your soulmate is less likely to be attracted to you. In other words, people who live a happy life are known to be more approachable and likeable by those around them.
3. Spread kindness
True bonds, love or friendship, are born out of compassion and kindness. Those who are selflessly kind to others are loved by one and all. Being kind not only means making kind gestures, but it also includes being there for people. Be patient and listen to people with a genuine interest in their lives.
Don’t be selfish and don’t think about what’s in it for you. Don’t try to dominate, manipulate, or control anybody. Instead, let them be free and fearless around you. When you are honest and kind, true love is predestined to find you.
4. Know yourself
More often than not, relationships and friendships fail because you don’t know what you want out of them. And, sometimes, you give in too much and give up out of frustration. To avoid these circumstances, it is important that you know what you want in your life and out of the people in your life.
Ask yourself what you like and believe in. Find out what brings happiness and serenity to your mind. Look for what matters to you. Only when you have an answer to all of these would you be truly ready for a companionship.
5. Pay attention to things happening around you
You know how people talk about ‘unexpectedly bumping into someone who is now their partner’? Things happen around us constantly. And, they happen for a reason. Nothing is a coincidence. In fact, everything that happens in your life is to bring you closer to what is meant for you.
More often than not, people are so busy in materialistic things around them that they wouldn’t notice their soul mate even if they stood right in front of them. Pay attention to these events.
6. Have fun and be fun
Finding true love or real friends are two of the most beautiful feelings in the world. And, no one has ever found love or friendship being serious and negative all the time. If you can’t smile or enjoy your life, you will never attract positivity.
Understand that it is not enough to want to find real friendship or true love. You must reflect positive energy that brings people closer to you. Have fun, enjoy your life, and at the same time, be ready for when the universe brings you face to face with those that you are meant to spend a lifetime with.
8 Signs You Have Found Your Soulmate
When you feel indescribably connected to someone, that you complete each other and make each other happy – you will know you have found your soulmate. You will also find that you love them for their flaws, and feel quite intensely for them. Other signs to look out for are – feeling other’s joys and sorrows, having easy conversations, and respecting each other’s space.
Finding your soulmate is extremely different than being with your life partner. You may spend an entire lifetime with someone and not feel content. At other times, an unexpected encounter with a stranger may keep you thinking about them for days, even years. Your life partner may make you feel loved, may support you every way, and may make you happy, but a soul mate enriches your spirit.
So, how do you know if your partner is your soulmate or if you have met them already?
1. You can’t describe how you feel with them
Trying to put how you feel with your soulmate into words is not just difficult, it’s impossible. Being with your soul mate makes you feel a profound sensation and tenacity than words can’t ever justify.
2. You complete each other
Have you ever met a couple who are known to finish each other’s sentences, or know what the other person is thinking without even asking them? People make fun of it as ‘spending a lot of time together’, but that is what a soul mate connection looks like.
3. You love them with all their flaws
Like usual relationships, soul mate relationships also undergo ups and downs. But, difficult situations don’t have the ability to break their bond. Instead, they are capable of loving each other with all their imperfections and become stronger with every hurdle they face.
4. You feel intensely for one another
As mentioned before, soul mate relationships can’t be put into words, however, they are intense. This means that they feel every good and bad thing more intensely than anybody else. However, the most important factor is that they are able to look past the bad experience and resolve problems to strengthen their bond.
5. You feel like it’s the two of you against the world
Soulmate bonds often make people feel so linked and attached to each other that they would be ready to overcome any challenge as long as they are together. These relationships are founded on trust, loyalty, and unity.
6. You feel each other’s joy as well as sorrows
When you are with your soul mate, you tend to be happy in their happiness and hurt when they are sad. You are able to experience all of them emotions, even before they tell you anything. Both of you can look at each other and feel what the other person is experiencing.
7. You find it easy to hold conversations
Soulmates never shy from having deep conversations. In fact, it is one of the best ways they connect with each other. They find it extremely easy to express their respective opinions and share their concerns whenever the need arises. They aren’t afraid to talk about what makes them happy and what doesn’t.
8. You respect each other’s space and don’t feel threatened by it
With soul mates, there’s barely any room for insecurities. They know what they mean to each other, and that they would never do anything to be apart. This is why they don’t feel threatened when one of the partners requires some time off to be on their own once in a while or catch up with friends once every week. They trust each other, and they are capable of respecting each other’s need for space.
It is important to note that not everybody finds their twin soul. Sometimes, it takes multiple lifetimes before you are united with the one destined for you. If you are in a loving relationship, try and analyze it before you decide they are not the one. Maybe, all you need is just another thorough look to realize you have been with your soul mate all your life.
In this world full of affordable duplicates and manipulative relationships, the hope for finding your one true love still exists. Your perfect partner has already been decided by the red thread of fate. All you have to do is be open towards meeting them, and when you do, embrace them with all your love and compassion.
Namrata Singh is a dentist turned writer and clinical researcher. Eager to learn about anything and everything, she is what you would call a jack of all trades and master of none. With a zeal for reading novels, books and anything she could get her hands on ever since she was little, she embarked into a writing career purely out of luck. After indulging in a freelancing career for nearly two years, she can now write on anything - from dentistry to decor, travel to technology, medicine to management - but psychology remains her first love. Having dealt with mental health issues in the past, she hopes to raise awareness for the same and help people with her work in association with The MindFool team