Signs your girlfriend is cheating…
You Googled this and it led you here…
It’s sad that you are doubting your girlfriend’s actions and are suspicious about whether there’s “someone” else hidden underneath.
But there sure is some reason that you have suddenly started questioning the love and commitment you always valued.
Don’t worry. You are not alone on this ride… it’s difficult, I know… but today or tomorrow, the truth has to be told and dealt with.
But first, let’s find out
Is She Cheating On you?
It isn’t rare or out of the ordinary to think that your girlfriend is cheating on you, especially in relationships that have just started or are going through a rocky phase.
Sometimes, there are warning signs and sometimes, it is just an eerie feeling that you can’t seem to get rid of. In the modern-day world, healthy relationships are important, not just for your mental health but also for your happiness.
While it is a common belief that men cheat in relationships, it doesn’t mean a woman can’t be the one who is dishonest in a relationship. Infact, many times, you would have done your research, checked social media, and even consulted your friends, yet you fail to find the clarity you need for figuring out if your girlfriend is cheating on you.
After having to deal with a cheating girlfriend, you might have trust issues, but the priority is to get out of that relationship and have a face-to-face conversation. All said and done, you can always count back on a licensed clinical psychologist to help you get through the bad phase.
Coming back to your original question, there are various ways to know whether your girlfriend is cheating on you.
So, let me first cite a few…
Characteristics of a cheating girlfriend
There are some key tick marks or checkboxes in the mental scenarios you get when you try to deal with a cheating girlfriend.
It can be her past behavior patterns, her habits, her history, or simply her attitude towards little things. Here is a list of 10 characteristics that can hint at your girlfriend being a cheater in your relationship.
1. The Wild chick
Your girlfriend has probably always been someone who enjoys breaking rules or finding loopholes. She has been someone who enjoys doing something different and out of the box. Her social status in your friend circle is of a free soul, never bound by any commitments or boundaries.
Infact, you’ll always have people sow a seed of doubt in your mind, what made her settle down and slow down for you? How has she been actively avoiding her common traits of being wild and free with you? Does she want an exclusive relationship or not?
Well, it is definitely a characteristic that can raise some eyebrows.
2. The Hungry fox
A female who enjoys taking lead and charge is often the most attractive personality for men. She is greedy for attention and hungry for sex.
For these kinds of women, sex is often the trigger point. When they find multiple sexual partners, they get out-of-control and cheat on you even if they aren’t emotionally connected to everyone.
It is a habit for them to be the queen, be in control of men, and enjoy the pleasure of it all. For them, it isn’t about a long-term relationship, it is about a worthy partner and a dominating role.
3. The Impulse Control
These are the kind of girlfriends who have always managed to stay calm and be a part of secure relationships. They do have the urges to maybe find a better boyfriend or find the thrill of dating multiple men at once, yet they have controlled any such drastic decisions.
However, they are also the type of women who can have a bad moment or a bad night. A drunk one nightstand or a kiss after a big fight, they manage to mess up the one good relationship in their life. It is like a switch goes off in their minds.
However, what might make it worth a try is they do feel guilty after all and try to make it up to their partner.
4. The Dispirited
A woman can always have her own insecurities or doubts. She might always feel worried about putting more effort into a relationship, without getting the same love back.
Even if you have been keeping everything fair, putting your heart and soul into the relationship, she’ll still feel disheartened.
Infact, they’ll often try to find another man to hug and have a shoulder to cry on. It is an act of emotional cheating, where they feel that their partner at home never does anything for them.
If the woman feels like she is the only one making adjustments to support the relationship, she will be tempted to look outside.
5. The Bored
Women can often get bored after the initial honeymoon phase of the relationship ends. When things get serious and they have to put in constant effort, the monotony bores them. A simple way for them to find the thrill again is to get rid of the commitment by cheating.
Not only do they get the rush, but they also find a new potential boyfriend in the process. The addiction to the excitement is what makes them cheat or break-up with you.
Moreover, the saddest part is, a bored woman commonly cheats in the most picture-perfect relationships.
6. The Self-sabotage
Whenever you sit down with your girlfriend for a face-to-face conversation, she gets nervous and doubtful. Her fear of emotional intimacy has been a barrier that took you months to break before dating her.
Yet, it is this nature of fear that makes her self-sabotage her relationships via cheating. She uses cheating as an excuse to run away or to counter her fear. She knows you will break up with her after you find out, letting her take a step back from confessing her emotions.
7. The Habituated
There are some people who have probably cheated in their past relationships due to many possible reasons. It sort of becomes a habit for them, to cheat on their partner and go through the entire cycle of secrecy, pleasure, and guilt.
Some women might also use this as an escape mechanism when they cannot find themselves being honest or direct to suggest a breakup.
Additionally, cheating comes naturally to them, either because their past relationships have managed to work even after they have cheated or because they simply enjoy the thrill.
8. The Narcissist
She has always been the difficult one to date. She is the role model of all girls who is extremely demanding, selfish, and inconsiderate towards their partner. This isn’t a common attribute, yet your girlfriend can have her traits of narcissistic tendencies.
Infact, she is someone who would individually figure out that you are neglecting her or maybe cheating on her. When she thinks so, her narcissistic trait would stop her from talking to you. She would rather go ahead and take revenge on you, without considering the possibility that she might be wrong in doubting your love.
9. The Family History
Many times, marriage and family therapists mention how it is always difficult for a couple to thrive if any of the partners have had a family history of cheating in couples. This can either mean that your girlfriend’s parents cheated on each other or her mom left her dad for someone else.
This not only causes a certain amount of trauma but also somewhat makes her anxiety fuel her desire to cheat. Your girlfriend’s past is a pattern that further hints at how she will navigate her own relationships. While it isn’t definite, there’s always a doubt.
10. The Dependent
Your girlfriend has always been someone who needs a hand around her shoulders. She is always dependent on her counterpart and strives to be a priority all the time.
However, in long-term relationships, there are phases where you need more work from both ends and you might need to prioritize your career for a bit.
During these times, she might crave the attention you haven’t been giving her. She’ll need the affirmation of a guy who can spend time with her regularly. This can cause a crack in your healthy bond, leading to her cheating on you.
How to know your Girlfriend is Cheating on You?
The key to answering all your doubts is always trusting your instincts. Always be aware of the relationship and each other’s feelings while also not letting your past sabotage the bond. Many times, a sneak peek at a text message or a glance at your partner’s social media can also say a lot.
It requires observation and care. In a relationship, there are small signs that can give you a clear idea about the situation. Infact, a relationship expert often consults a couple about any obvious or hidden warnings that they have felt or noticed. This can include changing behavior, frequent fights and lack of communication between the couple.
Moreover, the easily observed signs are always physical which brings us to…
Physical Signs Your Girlfriend is Cheating
When it comes to figuring out the infidelity of your girlfriend, you might have to get into detective mode to find the answer of “Is My Girlfriend Cheating on Me?” You must observe her every activity and if nothing works, simply ask her.
However, the signs listed below don’t confirm if your girlfriend is a cheater. She might be innocent while displaying such signs but you shouldn’t let the red flag go that easily and confront her the minute you feel something fishy about her.
Nevertheless, these signs will help you uncover the truth:
1. She looks distracted
During the years of your loving relationship, she was paid attention to even minute details of your life. Suddenly, she turns disinterested in your life. She is lost somewhere and is hardly present with you. This is quite a sure sign that your partner is cheating on you.
2. She is uncomfortable in making eye contact
One very obvious sign that she is doing something she shouldn’t is when she is unable to look into your eyes, which earlier seemed to be quite her thing. When a person does something wrong, she or he fails to maintain eye contact.
It is a sign that there is a fear inside them. Thus, they cannot gather the courage to see into the eyes purely because eyes are the gateway to the soul.
3. She gets a makeover
Now, this doesn’t mean that there is something wrong about her. Many women love changing their looks from time-to-time. However, if she is someone who is usually seen in jeans and a t-shirt and suddenly leaves the house wearing dresses and puts on make-up, well, then the truth of her is being hidden from you. There is also quite a lot of change in her grooming habits.
4. She makes sure that her phone is away from you
When she suddenly starts to keep her phone out of your reach, it’s a clear sign that her heart is somewhere else. She has been texting and talking with someone else outside of your relationship and the worst part is that she doesn’t want you to know about it. So, be aware of what she throws at you in the near future. This may very well be one of the signs your girlfriend is cheating on you.
If she is always on her phone, even in the bathroom, be ready to accept that the love of your life is not what you thought she was. It’s heartbreaking in every sense of the world, but that can’t be the reason to be in the dark purposefully.
5. She is not interested in getting physical
It is emotionally draining to know that your partner isn’t interested in having sex with you. Even if she does, she detaches immediately after it’s over. Less physical activity between both of you occurs when her attention is focused on someone else. That’s a clear sign. There is no other reason that she wouldn’t want to do it with you. So, be careful when she starts escaping the possibility of having sex with you.
When the physical intimacy in your relationship isn’t how it used to be, it’s a good time to have that talk with her and consider if it is one of the signs your girlfriend is cheating on you.
6. She starts arguing when you ask her questions
This is quite a clear sign of someone who is cheating on you—they start getting angry at you or start their own arguments with you. Being argumentative is a sign that they are feeling guilty and fear in reality and their ego is protecting them from revealing the truth to you.
While you both know the truth behind their actions and anger, it is for the best to let the anger and ego settle before you can finally break them down and know the truth. Once you do, walk out of the door and think with a calm mind about what to do next.
7. She is usually in a bad mood around you
Many men have informed that before they found out that their girlfriend was cheating on them, they noticed a drastic change in her behavior that often exhibited a bad mood for no reason. The reason why girls behave this way is because they feel stuck and guilty with their boyfriends since deep down, they know they are doing something wrong.
Thus, they act out of their usual behavior and often lash out on their partner thinking that their rash behavior would make them stop talking to them and they would focus on their other lover.
8. She smiles looking at her phone
When someone new and seemingly special enters her life and she keeps texting /talking to them, then whether they want to or not, there is a smile on their face. As much as it hurts you, this smile or happiness is an indication that she is enjoying the company of someone who is becoming more special to her than you.
Meeting someone new can be quite ecstatic and exciting for a girl because it involves her emotions and that is honestly, the worst kind of betrayal. Nonetheless, it is important for you to take a stand and once she confirms your doubt, it is time for you to show her the door.
Other General Signs She is Cheating on You
9. She starts talking about different futures
The ‘we’ in the future is suddenly replaced by ‘I’ and that’s a big sign of why you must think about her actions and intentions. This is one of the most obvious signs your girlfriend is cheating on you, and you should start grilling her about the truth.
If you have been in a long-term relationship and your girlfriend suddenly talks about different futures, well, then believe it or not, she wants you out of your life and has already found someone else.
10. She starts lying about things
When a partner is lying about things, it is usually because she has another agenda in his or her head. This is one of the most important signs your girlfriend is cheating on you, but it may not always mean that. This usually means that they are cheating on you with someone else. If you have been in a long-time relationship with them or are connected too deeply with them, then your gut feeling will tell you about their lies.
In any case, there will be times when you will catch their lies and they would immediately start feeling guilty about their actions. However, that shouldn’t make you fearful of facing the truth. You must go ahead get everything off of your chest and tell them about what you feel about them and their actions.
11. She doesn’t want to spend time with you
When she starts pulling away from you and decides to spend her time doing something else or worse, stays out most of the time, then perhaps she is going out with someone else as well. The chances of her cheating you are more if she does not otherwise do not like staying out a lot.
It is emotionally and physically draining to deal with this behavior of a person you love so much and have known for so long, but you know the best thing to teach them a lesson is to show them the door and shut it on their face!
12. She goes out to meet her friends without you
Even if you enjoy hanging out with her friends and you often used to go out to meet them with her, her sudden change in behavior exhibits her clear intention of no more letting you hang out with her friends and family. This is one of the most important signs your girlfriend is cheating on you, but it may not always mean that.
Even if you insist on meeting them, she would give you one reason or another to not take you with her. In fact, she rather insists you to go and spend some time with your friends! That’s kind-of-a manipulative behavior on her part. Don’t let her play you anymore and confront her well and good.
13. Her schedule has changed out-of-nowhere
When it’s not a job switch, apartment change or any other obvious reason and her daily routine or schedule has changed, there might be an icky reason behind it. That’s not it, her priorities change too and you seem to not be her favorite person anymore. It is disheartening but as soon as you confront her about her true intentions, the more time it will save you from being in a wrong relationship.
Remember, there can be many reasons why her schedule has changed and not infidelity alone. But it’s always wise to discuss any doubts or confusion brewing in your chest. If she isn’t guilty, she wouldn’t mind clearing the doubts. Instead, she will be really impressed with your way of showing concern.
14. She wants to know about your whereabouts
While it may seem to you that she wants to know where you are all the time out of concern or care, there are chances of something else brewing inside her head. The reason why she is so concerned about your whereabouts can be because she is looking for the perfect moment to get you out of home so that she can chill with her mystery lover. You have got to remain careful about her behavior.
If you want to clear all your doubts at once, try to use this situation in your favor. When she asks about your whereabouts, step out of the house but return 2-3 hours before time. If she is cheating on you, you will find her with that “secret=someone”. If not, just twist it around and tell her you are back early to surprise her. Either way, it’s a win-win!
15. She is not as open to you as she used to
When she starts keeping things to herself, there might be a chance that she is focused on someone else and has started sharing her emotions and feelings with him. If she is not telling you about how her day went or about his new yoga class she has joined or what else is going on in her life, she got secrets and you might not be a part of this other life of hers anymore.
She is no more candid with you and seems to have been living this new life of hers. Pick up the vibes since the energy never lies and it’s time to say goodbye to her. This is one of the most important signs your girlfriend is cheating on you, but it may not always mean that.
16. She thinks that you are insecure
If your girlfriend is usually loving and supportive toward you, your family and career, and all of a sudden, stop taking interest in all those things, of course, it will ring a bell and you would ask her if there is a problem.
While a good girlfriend would clear your doubt calmly, someone who is guilty of cheating would lash out on you and tell you that you are insecure and need to get a life. She does this so that you doubt yourself and instead of listening to their own psyche, start listening and moreover, trusting her more.
Do not fall into this trap like most good men often do. Listen to your intuition and get to the bottom of what you feel is happening wrongly. Respecting a woman is the sign of a good gentleman but knows the difference between respecting her and self-respect.
17. She apparently spends a lot of time at work
If you have been in a long-term relationship, you must be knowing her work schedule. If her usual work schedule does not call for her to spend longer than official hours at her workplace and all of a sudden, she is spending a lot of time at the office, something about the situation might be fishy. This is one of the most important signs your girlfriend is cheating on you.
The best way to get over your doubt is to pay her a visit in her office without informing her about the same. If you find her working there, well and good. However, if you do not find her there, ask her co-workers about the same and find where she is. If you find her hanging out with her mystery lover, then confront her and take things accordingly.
18. She has trouble saying ‘I love you’
What seemed like the easiest thing for her to say to you will suddenly become very difficult. No matter how lovingly you say ‘I love you’ to her, she will have trouble replying back. Of course, her soul knows that what she is doing is wrong and doesn’t want her to degrade herself more by feeding you another lie.
Generally, she avoids listening when you say the three magical words or when she has no other choice, she says it with a lack of enthusiasm. That alone should make you realize that even if she is not cheating on you, the spark between both of you is gone or going and there might be a chance that she is thinking of leaving you or is already in the process.
19. Her way of speaking changes
When a person spends a lot of time with someone, they take up their speaking style and even their phrases. This doesn’t necessarily mean that your girlfriend is hanging out with a new date. She might be spending a lot of time with her friends or co-workers. However, no one spends so much time with a friend unless they are roommates.
If she is speaking so much alike someone you know or don’t know, you should be aware about an uncomfortable situation that might build up in future. The best way is to confront her and ask her about this friend or you-know-who. If she’d have even slightest of self-respect left in her, she would blurt out the truth.
20. She starts accusing you of cheating on her
The best defense for someone who is a cheater is that they start blaming you for exactly what they are doing. This is one of the most important signs your girlfriend is cheating on you. People are a mirror and they usually see their truth in other people.
Thus, when she is finding futile reasons to blame you for cheating on her, take a deep breath, and understand that something is cooking between her and this person that you have no idea about. It’s a defense mechanism and instead for falling for it, tell her to speak her truth.
Signs of a Cheating Partner in a Relationship
The most common factor due to which personality traits start changing in a bond when your partner cheats on you is: secrecy.
Cheating is a choice after all… and your girlfriend made that decision herself. Hiding it and balancing the situation comes with its pitfalls. You’ll notice her lack of attention, an invisible barrier between both of you, and a vibe of coldness.
Each secret is a burden on the human heart. A burden can become obvious over time, especially if you have the right eye in the right place. Your girlfriend might not realize but she is leaving a lot of trails for you to guess her infidelity, including…
21. She is looking after herself
You’ll probably meet her after a week and be shocked to see so many significant changes. Maybe a new lipstick, a different dress or a new watch. She’ll start spending more time on herself, right from a morning skincare routine to beauty appointments.
You might feel happy that she is doing this for you, getting out of her comfort zone but ask yourself: Why now? Why not before?
This might not be a tell-all sign but it’s definitely a hint. Try to dig deeper and know whether she is taking these efforts for her office party or for an all-nighter with friends you don’t know much about? Is she only video calling you and meeting other people during the week?
If yes, there might be something cooking!
22. She is hardly available for you
You should definitely be doubtful if your girlfriend just stops spending time with you. Earlier, she was always making plans, finding new places to visit with you.
However, recently she has been canceling plans very frequently. Her most common go-to excuse can be “I am busy with work” or “My boss is giving me a hard time.”
This will sow a seed of doubt in your mind. She will never tell you the type of work she has or where she’ll be, it would always be vague answers to avoid meeting you or doing a quick video call. You won’t be wrong to think that she is with someone else or thinking about someone else.
23. She is not bothered about your friends/family
If your girlfriend always cared about your family and liked to meet them before, her sudden change of attitude will leave you with questions. She’ll stop texting in your common friend group, find excuses to skip dinner plans, and not show any concern when you talk about your family grievances.
Infact, there will be instances when she calls in-sick for all the family gatherings. You are more surprised because earlier she used to be excited about it.
Your friend’s birthday party where you invited her as your date, she’ll be out of town. It might not be obvious at first, but she is sneakily distancing herself from people who matter to you.
24. She picks up fights with you frequently
All the tiny habits that she found “cute” now leads to arguments. She’ll not answer your calls and call back to pick up a fight. Anything you tell her would make her feel insecure and judged. When you’ll always be the one apologizing, you might wonder, is it worth the effort?
You’ll be the one battling to keep the boat afloat while she’ll keep digging holes in it. You’ll often ask her about her life but she’ll ignore your questions.
When you talk about your day, she’ll be uninterested, digging back the fights or issues that have been all settled in the past. It becomes a never-ending circle of angry text messages, social media blocks, and apologies.
25. She doesn’t care about you anymore
The concern, conversations, and those tiny-surprises she planned to cheer you up were a few things that made you fall in love with her more and more every day. However, these days, she seems uninterested and hardly curious about your mood, your time, and YOU.
She’ll use her phone all the time, avoiding eye contact with you. You’ll probably be sick and not reply to her texts all day, but she won’t even realize it. The girl who would cook you a bowl of soup when you had a cold had suddenly forgotten the recipe now!
26. She is flirtatious (even in your presence!)
Along with wearing sexier clothes and attractive makeup, she would also indulge in flirting patterns. Even though both of you might have never had a problem with a little healthy flirting outside the relationship, things will be out-of-line now.
She will flirt with your friends or colleagues, irrespective of your presence. She’ll have a flirty smile even on dates with you and will never have a problem exchanging numbers with a guy she met, all in front of you.
Being a flirt and being rude are two different things. She would have zero care for your feelings because her one-and-only is now someone else!
27. She is extremely defensive
As a concerned boyfriend, whenever you would approach her, she always used to find it adorable and caring.
Now, you’ve become the villain, where she constantly complains of your extra care or plans. She’ll accuse you of being too nosy in her personal life whereas earlier she wanted to be a part of it.
Further, she’ll also defend her plans by calling “privacy” and even possibly ask you for space. She’ll stop being direct and genuine with her words, have a defensive trait to her attitude, and always portray her dissatisfaction with the relationship.
28. She spends more time in gym
Even if your girlfriend was always a gym lover, her time at the gym would suddenly spike up. She’ll try out new diet regimes, new workout routines, and even purchase new subscriptions. The reality check? She won’t ask you to join in or even suggest it to you!
Her self-obsession becomes evident, which should make you wonder about the hidden motive behind this lifestyle change. Moreover, she’ll not talk much about her time at the gym or introduce you to the people she works out with. For her, it becomes an escape from your calls and also a chance to look better for her secret-someone.
29. She has changed spending behaviors
Chances are that if you have been dating for a year or more, you know your partner’s spending patterns. You know where she splurges money and where she saves. You also know the restaurants she likes to visit, products that become irresistible to her, and so on.
But if you have noticed a sudden change, it is quite possible because of the new entrant in her life. She will start spending more than usual. She might tell you how her bank balance has depleted but you won’t know why. From gifts to outings, her secret-someone is taking up space and expenses.
She’ll also spend more on clothes and make-up. She’ll even start spending more on travel, finding an excuse to run away from you.
30. She goes to another room (to do her own things!)
It is absolutely normal for a couple to take their personal time and work on their personal hobbies, interests, or dreams. Yet, when it becomes a daily habit, it can take a major hit in your relationship.
The most concerning part? She’ll know if you are taking a break from a movie night for work or a meeting but you’ll never know why she is always running away to her room.
If it is for some quick cyber intimacy or online chatting, she’ll always make excuses of a washroom break or a work call, which you can easily figure out are blatant lies because you can hear the keyboard typing or the whispers.
Sure Signs of a Cheating Girlfriend
Whenever there is a problem, there are always certain sure shot solutions to it. Similarly, whenever there is a doubt, there are sure shot ways to get a realistic answer.
Infact, in a relationship, it is always easy to dig deep and know if your girlfriend is cheating on you. Have some faith and look for these sure signs in her behavior and vibe.
31. She checks out other men
In addition to all the secrecy and lying, her fondness of cute or sexy men will suddenly spike. Not only will she constantly check out men in her workplace or at restaurants, but she’ll also start talking about them to you.
The way she talks about a handsome man in the metro or a new bachelor in the complex, with all giggles and starry eyes can say a lot. You’ll notice her friends always discussing a new man they all met during a girl’s night out.
But who’s the speaker? Ofcourse, your girlfriend. She just keeps on blabbering about the so-called “cute” interactions with her new-found man!
32. She gets lazy or avoids doing daily chores
Your girlfriend will not ever stay at home. She’ll either be away for work or for meetings that suddenly pop-up. Her idea of spending time with you is now all about a quick catch-up lunch or a video call.
Even when she is at home, she has become a couch potato. She used to enjoy cooking for you a Sunday meal but now wants to order in. She used to enjoy hosting family/friends at home, now she asks you to meet them at a café instead.
Earlier, she used to enjoy doing chores so that you can take your afternoon nap sometimes, yet now, she’ll not even offer to help.
33. She is not jealous of you
Your girlfriend is always smart enough to cleverly tell other women that you are taken. She’ll hold your hand at parties or lay her head on your shoulder during travels. Whenever she sees another girl having an eye for you, she was the one who used to come to your rescue.
Yet now, she’ll actually let you flirt with other women more and also use this as a reason to fight. She’ll not feel jealous at all when you tell her about going out and meeting your female friends or how a girl showed you affection at a party. In fact, she’ll not even blink an eyelid with worry or anger.
34. She says “she’s not happy”
Your girlfriend’s go-to statement for every conversation would now be ‘I’m not happy about this. I’m not satisfied with this. I’m not happy with us.’
She might not say it bluntly, but she is finding flaws in everything you do. Her smile vanishes when she is with you and her mood plummets.
It wouldn’t be the same when she goes out with her friends or attends office parties with colleagues; the sad face is just for the times when she is with you. It is highly probable that she is constantly thinking about someone else and doesn’t want to be around you.
35. She does all the laundry on her own
Clothing can tell you a lot about the person – yes even infidelity. A change of scent on your girlfriend’s top or a new hoodie she seems to have purchased can catch your eye while doing laundry.
Your girlfriend always complained about how you are never on-time for doing household chores and suggests doing laundry together as a bonding game, but now she simply stops asking for your help.
There are high chances she is doing this to remove any trail, scent, or marks in her clothing. Infact, how will you ever know if she came back home in someone else’s shirt while you were asleep and didn’t see the laundry the next day?
36. She acts indifferent
It is important for you to focus on where your concerns are coming from – is her attitude changing daily or is she suddenly becoming indifferent? Her style of talking would become random and vague whilst her tendency to not care about what you are doing will keep rising.
She’ll shrug whenever you raise a point, walk away easily during fights and not even worry if you don’t reply back to her for days. Her lack of sympathy would make you feel unwanted overtime. If you could relate to these points – you aren’t being paranoid, she is probably cheating on you.
37. She doesn’t want to cuddle
A relationship is built on three completely different aspects, each aspect with its own time, importance, and journey. There is the mental support, the emotional connection, and then the physical touch.
From being a PDA lover to a distant soul, from cuddling with you on the bed to sitting on the opposite end of the sofa, from being a don’t-leave-me-now person to a stiff sleeper, her physical needs have suddenly started changing.
Avoiding cuddles and hugs, you will often find her shrugging you off with “I don’t feel like doing it now.” If you are wondering about the reason, however harsh it may sound, it’s possible that she has found her cuddling haven in someone else.
38. She kisses you without any passion
A kiss can tell a lot, from the first touch to the longing feeling. A true-love kiss is filled with passion and warmth. However, when the bond fades or there is any sourness, the kiss will naturally start to feel monotonous and boring.
You will find her kisses hollow like it’s out of force or habit and not out of love. While you will notice these tiny chances, she will be least bothered about how her kiss made you feel.
For her, it will start being a task because her mind is wandering somewhere else with someone else. Even relationship experts vouch for the fact that a big hug and a French kiss, can tell you the truth almost instantly.
39. She is not ready for commitment
From a girl who used to always be dreamy about a stable and secure relationship, she’ll suddenly start dodging any discussions about long-term commitment. She now has a list of doubts about the future of the relationship like long-distance, relationship stability, and open relationships.
Your weekly romantic movie nights will shift to dark comedy and your grand anniversary celebrations will convert to boring lunches.
She’ll start questioning your choices, your proposals, and pick on each small issue. For her, the standard answer will be the fear of commitment, even when it was never a topic of debate before.
And, most importantly…
40. She is cheating… Your gut says
Let me say this, out and clear: Your gut is never wrong. With all the signs pointing in the same direction, your gut somehow senses that something is very wrong. It might be from past experiences or just plain “I know my girlfriend”, if you know she is cheating on you then there’s a 100% chance she is.
Infact, if you’ve always been a person who trusts your gut and it always turned out to be true, you know your odds. However, gut alone can’t be the deciding factor of whether or not your girlfriend is cheating on you. Introspect with the other signs mentioned above and then make the final decision.
What to do when you know your girlfriend is cheating?
Once you are sure about the ongoing crisis, do remember to not do anything rash, impulsive, or drastic. You need to give yourself a minute to figure out the situation and plan your next action.
Make a step towards peace and not having any regrets. There are different choices, ways to untangle yourself from this situation. You can start from here.
1. Accept your feelings
When the realization hits, you would be a dynamite waiting to explode. Anger, grief, guilt, pain, and confusion will all cloud your mind. These feelings are absolutely normal yet they can also make you lose your self-respect.
Hence, give yourself time to heal and find your happiness again. The relationship was your home for a while but now, you have to rebuild the home for yourself and on your own. Spend some time with yourself, find the hope you need and the power to deal with the insecurities.
2. Stop blaming yourself
In the midst of all mixed feelings, you might wonder, Did I do something to hurt her? Did I do something wrong? Did she find love somewhere else because I wasn’t enough?
You have to stop. Stop doubting yourself, stop doubting your love, and stop doubting your care. When a partner starts to cheat, you are not the problem.
There are a gazillion reasons why it could have happened, but crying and feeling self-pity for yourself will not solve the problem. It was her choice and her action that caused you the pain. Not the other way round.
3. Determine what you want
Once you feel calm and composed, you have to introspect. You might be the victim here but now it’s time to take control. The relationship is now poisoned with infidelity but are you ready to restart with an antidote?
Do you want to see her in your future? Does she bring you joy, even after she cheated on you? Are you okay with an open relationship otherwise?
All these questions will help you determine what you want for the future. Is the trust enough or do you need more?
It is only after you determine your true feelings, you can build the pathway to move on.
4. Talk to Your Partner
If the relationship for you is worth saving so why not give it a shot? Why not have a discussion and get rid of the negative energy?
A confrontation is crucial when you know the reality and without a conversation, you’ll never know what led her to this. So, if during the conversation you anticipate she is regretful of her actions and wants to start over, then why not? But, if she isn’t remorseful and very confused herself, it’s better to call it off.
Find out the reason why it went wrong and don’t let the anger control you. A heart-to-heart with your girlfriend will tell you: do you both want the same things or is it time to walk on different paths?
In the end,
Understand That You Are Worthy of Love No Matter the Result
Whether they cheat on you or not, you must not lose your self-esteem at any cost. You are deserving of love, even more, because you aren’t afraid to commit to your decision of loving someone who couldn’t do the same to you.
People don’t come into this world with a guidebook; they commit mistakes, sometimes, these mistakes leave the other person devastated, sometimes, they don’t even care if they have hurt people who love them beyond reasons—whatever be the reason, it is for you to remember that people cheat and the ones who do usually have low self-esteem and self-worth. Thus, they do these things out of fear-based thinking. They are the way they are because it is their being, not yours.
So, no matter what someone does to you, please remember that you are deserving of love and one day, you will find someone who will fit the puzzle. It’s just that you shouldn’t stop trusting people after someone cheats on you, and encourage yourself to open up to love again.
Parting Words from TheMindFool
Love is the most powerful emotion. It can literally transform a person or a being if given purely and freely. Thus, it is important to never settle for a love that you have to fight for. It is the law of the universe that you get what you give and deserve.
So, if your girlfriend had cheated on you in the past or you think is currently cheating on you, then the best thing you can do for yourself is to let go and move on. Who knows, the love of your life might be waiting for you around the corner.
Frequently Asked Questions
After it all, when you confront her and try to end things, she’ll enter into denial and vehemently not agree to everything you say. She’ll blame you for misjudging her and find loopholes in all the proof you have gathered.
Instead of being upset, shocked, or hurt, she’ll be brutal and create a ruckus. Her words will be spiteful and she won’t accept her mistake. When your girlfriend is cheating on you and does not feel a shred of guilt, that is when you know, it is time to turn your back towards her.
A long-distance relationship works on effort, faith, and understanding. When these three start to falter and leave you in a pool of self-doubt, there is something off about your girlfriend. Think about it this way, is she putting the same effort as before?
Is she planning birthday surprises like before? Does she fail to understand your concerns and issues? Or is she purposefully avoiding your calls, emails, and texts, trying to create a communication gap?
Cheaters are never happy and the regret starts showing. A quick video call can show your partner’s distraction and the aura of mystery her life suddenly has. With long-distance relationships requiring double the commitment and thrice the hard work, it isn’t rare for a partner to falter along the way.
Surabhi has a deep passion for words. She puts her heart and mind into whatever she pursues and craves for creative ventures. She has always been keen on creating original content that can make a difference. In her experience as a content writer, she has had the opportunity to work on several fields with Psychology being her favorite. Surabhi says, words have the power to transform the world, better than a sword. So she hopes to contribute her bit to this revolution. At TheMindFool, she feels lucky to have the opportunity to share content capable of bringing about a change in the lives of the readers.