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How to Talk to Girls – A Simple and Effective Guide

How to Talk to Girls – A Simple and Effective GuideUpdated on January 30, 2021 | Published on January 13, 2020
Reviewed by Julianne Cantarella, MSW, LSW, Certified Relationship Coach

How to Talk to Girls - A Simple & Effective Guide

Does talking to a girl key you up, makes you stutter, or even worse – freeze you? And are awkward silences always there to ruin the moment? Well, then you must be looking for a guide about – ‘How to talk to girls?‘. 

Yes, not all men are like the one in movies who can charismatically strike a conversation with anyone around. In fact, many are shy or just generally nervous around women. So, can’t they ever solve this mystery about ‘How to talk to girls’? Of course, they can! And for this, let’s directly get to the point –

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Master Tips about How to Talk to Girls


How to talk to girls

While this may surprise some that one needs such a guide in this century, it is nothing to be embarrassed about. After all, not everyone is the same, right? So, it is completely normal to take expert help. Just remember – simplicity is the key. And if you encounter some tangled ways and magical advice by the so-called ‘Gurus’, it’s time to move back! In short, in most cases, simple tips are effective ones. So, let’s see these master tips –

1. Find Your Way about How to Talk to Girls

In brief, this is the most crucial thing. Well, there are two ways to approach a girl. One is the direct way, another – the indirect one. Both are effective when done right. Now, you have to decide which one you are a fan of. 

Directly, you’ll simply tell her what’s in your mind. Like, ‘Hi, I’m Liam. If you find it convenient, I’d love to have a talk with you’. Now, some may find it a bit shocking, but not creepy for sure. And others may find it even attractive. For Indirect way, you’ll go like – ‘Hi, Could you pass me that drink’, or something like that. Then, you can carry it forward. This method is safer, though time-taking.  

2. Just Initiate 

Yes, you’ll feel nervous, awkward, and even scared. But just initiate. Don’t worry! She’s a human – just like you. Thus, even if she says a ‘No’, it’s Okay. There is nothing to be embarrassed about or have fear. In fact, it can be the other way round too. Who knows, she might be wanting to talk to you! 

So, just go there and start. You can choose any of the two ways. Simply go there and say something to strike the conversation. Maybe introduce yourself, or ask her if she’ll mind if you join. You can, in fact, ask a mutual friend to get you introduced to her.

3. Be Confident while Talking to Girls

When you approach a girl, she can instantly sense if you are confident or not. This is because of your overall body language, way of speaking, etc. gets influenced by your inner thoughts. And this nervousness doesn’t make you shine the way you actually are. So, try to be confident. 

Okay, approaching the girl makes you nervous. It’s quite obvious. But you can make it much better if you want. Just take a deep breath. Calm down. Count 1 to 5 and be there before completing your countdown. This is the best way to get above the frozen mode. So, give it a try. And even if you fumble, don’t care. Indeed, some women actually find it cute. 

4. Respect Her

And this refers to genuine respect. Of course, all of us like to be in a sphere where we feel respected. And the girl you are approaching is no exception. So, don’t miss this basic point. This means you shouldn’t begin like – ‘Honey, Will you ….’. Or, talk to her in a way too cocky manner. This will instantly make her mood off. In fact, she can get into a defensive mode. 

Thus, be polite. For this, use the right words, gestures, and expressions. She should feel like being in a comfortable sphere, not like being threatened. If confused about up to what limit counts in being respectful, simply choose to be in the safer boundary. Remember – better to look a bore rather than a creep. 

5. Make Positive Eye Contact 

Psychologically, this is very important. When you look into someone’s eyes, it makes her feel good and makes her realize that you’re giving her the attention. Also, you both develop an unconscious bond among yourselves. Of course, this can make things easier for you. 

But make sure it is positive eye contact. Don’t Stare! Also, don’t look at her constantly or at her body parts. This will make her uncomfortable. So, make it a natural and friendly gaze. Look at other things and then again meet your eyes. This way, it will be more powerful, natural, and warm. Keep this eye contact during the conversation too. 

6. Be Presentable

No, you don’t have to look like Leonardo Di Caprio to attract women. But this doesn’t mean you’ll be there like a homeless person. To conclude – be presentable. That is, be well-groomed, dress well, smell well, and most importantly – feel good. This is more than enough. Be careful about cleanliness and grooming. This includes your clothes, shoes, and accessories. 

Besides, dress according to the situation. So, don’t be in shorts if you expect to have a dance with her in the club. Also, try to wear something that you feel fully comfortable in. Hence, no need to be in a gaudy suit when you actually can’t carry it well. Wearing something that you like will make you more calm, confident, and eventually – attractive. 

7. Give Her Honest Complements that are PROPER

‘Hi, you have those nice earrings’ – is good when you actually feel it. But, if you find the earrings weird and still do it just to impress, she will always know the truth. So, compliment a girl genuinely because this is what actually makes people feel good. 

Also, make sure that the complement doesn’t cross the line of decency. So, telling her – ‘You have a nice body’ is a big No. She’ll find it creepy thinking why at all were you staring at her body parts. To guide you, better to give genuine compliments about her ways, accessories, etc. Also, if you want to go further, stick to the hair or smile, and in more personal cases – eyes. Don’t move below that. 

8. Get to Know Them Conversation

You met her, introduced yourself, now what? Well, go for the common topics to talk about like the in trend ‘get to know me questions‘. This will help you both know each other better. Also, if things go well, you may find some really funny or crazy sides of yourselves. 

You can move forward with light but interesting topics. It can be like – what’s her hobby or what is her favorite drink that you can get her. And then, eventually move to something like – ‘What is the weirdest nickname you ever got?’ and other things cute and slightly personal like that. But remember to not make it too personal. Also, don’t ask continuously like an interview. 

9. Have a Safe Position while Talking to a Girl

Make her feel comfortable with your gesture and position. Didn’t get it? Well, your sitting or standing position with respect to her can do a lot unconsciously. So, keep in mind to not block her way. Always keep a free end so that she can easily move away if she wants to. This will make her feel more secure and safe with you. 

Thus, make her choose the seat if you’re going in a vehicle or in a restaurant. While standing, avoid being right in front of her. This small thing will bring in her a sense of trust for you. Also, she will take more interest in the conversation as her mind is not fixated at this inconvenient position. 

10. Avoid Stereotypical ‘Pick Up Line’

Not everyone out there is a dating coach. And the irony is, most of the people who teach you some so-called “working” formulas to impress women are either men or …. well, men. And if he is not a dating coach or a REALLY experienced friend of yours – chances are high that they are as clueless as you regarding this confusing topic of – ‘How to Talk to Girls’.

So, learn this – women don’t get attracted to those stereotypes and pick up lines. Also, every woman is unique. You can never get one fool-proof plan to apply to every lady you encounter. In fact, most of the time these formulas are so complicated, overwhelming, and creepy that it makes things worse. So, don’t fall into the trap. Just be genuine and it’ll work.

11. Be Natural while Talking to a Girl

You need to mug up some cool lines from the movies and theories given by that love ‘guru’ to talk to her, right? No! Think for yourself. If a guy comes to you and repeats the same line that you have heard umpteenth times, how will you feel about his credibility? Well, women feel the same. 

Also, when you try to pretend to be someone else, you are making it complicated for both of you. Firstly, it is ingenuine and morally wrong. Secondly, she’ll get a ‘something is wrong’ vibe from you. So, be natural. Don’t pretend or try too hard to impress her. 

12. Smile Often while Talking to a Girl

Smiling is probably the best thing humans have. And a genuine smile that comes from the heart touches others’ hearts. Psychologically, it creates a positive energy around you. Thus, she’ll feel more comfortable with you. Also, when you are out of words, a smile can do the work quite well.

But here also you have a catch. Smile when it is the point in smiling. Suppose, you’re talking about something serious and you give a smile out of nowhere. Will it work? Of course not. Also, your smile should be natural. It should not look like a pretension or ingenuine one. 

13. Don’t Be Too Personal

When things seem good and you are in flow, this is the time when you fumble most. Sometimes, over-excitement may lead you to ask too personal questions. Yes, exchanging basic personal information in the flow of conversation is right. But to get too personal is something you should really avoid. 

She may feel like you are trying to be too clingy or can have even a threatening feeling. Actually, women come across creeps on a daily basis. And she’ll never know if you’re the right guy in the first few minutes of the meeting itself. So, don’t force her to reveal more than she wants to about her personal life. Indeed, she’ll appreciate you for understanding her stance. 

14. Find Common

Well, to make your conversation more interesting, try to find a common ground. Like, if you both met at a friend’s place, you can begin with it. Or, if you find that she is much into movies and you like it too, tell her about it. 

In this way, both of you will come to common grounds where you are comfortable. This will also make her sub-consciously connect a bond with you in terms of that thing. You can talk about things like your hobbies, interests, career choices, etc. Basically, any subject that may bring a common ground between you two.

15. Ask Open-Ended Questions

‘Do you like coffee?’, ‘Yes, I do’. That’s all. To tell you, this is the way of conversation that you need to avoid. A yes/no based question will instantly limit your conversation. So, ask open-ended questions which can give her enough room to speak. This can be like – ‘What kind of beverage do you like?’. 

In fact, if she’s liking the conversation, she may reciprocate well with questions for you. An open-ended question gives both of you the opportunity to move to a more productive and insightful chat. And by this, you will not have to ask dozens of questions to fill the awkward silence. Hence, the conversation will find its own way.

16. Don’t Exaggerate about Yourself

No one likes a toxic narcissist personality. And if you’re constantly rambling about your own pros, you’re seeming one in her eyes. So, don’t exaggerate. Also, don’t be someone who you aren’t. No point in portraying yourself as a great biker or a millionaire when the story is something else. 

Firstly, she’ll realize the exaggeration and will be repelled by this ignorance of yours. Secondly, in the long run, it’ll be quite damaging for your own image. So, keep it genuine. Also, every woman is not looking for a knight in the shining armor. Most of the time, she is looking for a genuine, understanding being. So, be it. 

17. Don’t be a Puppy

You had an amazing conversation with a girl. So, you decided to follow her to every other place you can. Well, if you find nothing wrong in it, you need to revamp your mind. The first thing to make clear is – never to be a puppy who will follow her everywhere. 

Regardless of what Hollywood shows, generally, if a man follows a woman everywhere, it is counted as stalking. And she will never like to talk again to a stalker. So, don’t be one. Give her own space and maintain your dignity. If you really share things, make it happen normally.  

18. Make Things Simple

This is, of course, the most basic thing. But most of the time, people forget this. In any positive interaction, simplicity is the key. So, you should keep it simple – be it in terms of topics you choose, things you ask, or ideas you have in your mind.

Otherwise, she may get puzzled about you. So, don’t think too much or go through those complicated theories about getting a girl. Most of the time, this makes things complicated, boring, and even creepy. Thus, try to keep it simple. Have a thought? Great, just share it. Simply, no need to overthink.

19. Have Some Fun while Talking to Her

You are out there to talk to her. It’s as plain as that. But with your nervousness, confusion, this and that, you might miss this point. So, don’t forget that all you have to focus is on having some healthy fun. This includes talking to her on the topics you enjoy, at a party – having danced with her, maybe a fun game or anything like that.

Of course, she would also like to have a good time. So, instead of making it a serious discussion, make it enjoyable. Also, don’t forget that you should enjoy it too. Like, while talking about something that you think people find funny but not you, no need to stick to it. Enjoy your game first.

20. Take a Genuine Interest in Her

If you want her to take interest in you, you need to ensure the same for her. And this should not be like a forced interest. Instead, it should be a genuine interest in her thought process, ideas, interests, etc. In this way, you will be able to have a more natural conversation with her. 

Also, she will find it really convenient and interesting to talk to you when you are more genuine. Thus, your conversation will be more than simple ‘Yes/No’ or nodding. So, it will be regarding you two in a more efficient manner. 

21. Converse in True Sense

Learning how to talk is really underrated. Most of the time people mistake alternative speaking as a conversation. Well,  such talking is as useless as anything. Basically, the right conversation is the one where not only both of you will speak but also listen actively. 

And here, it is to ‘listen’ not hear. So, if you are nodding or occasionally saying some words without getting what exactly she is saying, it’s not a good conversation. Instead, you should participate in what she is sharing. And in this participation, your mind should be on her words, the way it should be. Eventually, she will reciprocate the same.

22. Take Fumbles Gracefully

How much you try, fumbles are inevitable. No, it doesn’t mean you will necessarily talk senseless stuff. It’s just that what you are expecting to be the best classy conversation is something that doesn’t happen generally. So, why focus on being perfect? Rather, be graceful in imperfections.

So, suppose you fumble by saying a wrong thing, or maybe by stuttering. No, you don’t have to flush with embarrassment for this. Simply have a confident laugh and let it go. That’s it. Or to put it like – no need to pull the string. Remember – everyone has their set of embarrassing experiences. So, she will also understand it.

23. Be Well-Mannered

Manners do matter. Well, if you will seem indecent, ill-mannered, or like a jerk, she is bound to ignore you. Also, being ill-mannered does not make you appear cool. Yes, just repeat it. So, it is always advisable to maintain dignity. Be well mannered in your ways and expression. 

The point is – your personality should have a healthy vibe. She should find you decent and a gentle person to talk with. This simple step will increase your chances of a conversation many folds. 

24. Be Yourself

In short, it is very important to feel good about yourself. Of course, you may find it puzzling. Like, how is it at all connected with the matter in hand, right? Actually, this is something you need to have for your wellness and healthy being. Understand that at any point, your existence matters most for you. And anything that harms it doesn’t matter.

In other words, you don’t have to pretend like someone else or try to change yourself completely just to gain the attention of others. Of course, being someone whom girls would like to talk about is your aim. But in this, losing your real self is definitely not worth it. And at the end of the day, you’ll be grateful for this little advice.

25. Accept No

You did everything perfectly, had the conversation quite smoothly, everything seemed fine but she’s still not interested in talking to you. Or maybe, she reciprocated at first but now she is losing interest. So, what will you do? The simplest and most effective answer is – Leave. 

Yes, you read it right. There is no point in applying various tricks or trying hard when things aren’t working really. You tried, it’s great. But it’s her right to say No. Also, this rejection is not necessarily yours. Basically, not everyone is compatible. At the same time, remember – you deserve being with someone who genuinely admires you. So, go there and find someone right!

So, we have covered all the points you need about ‘How to Talk to Girls?’. To make it clearer, let’s check this…

DOs and DON’Ts while Talking to Girls

While going on a date or talking to a girl for the first time, getting confused is normal. So, in that case, simply go through these simple DOs and DON’Ts guide about how to talk to girls. This will make it instantly clear for you!

DOs DON’Ts
Be gentle, respectful, and considerate. Don’t exaggerate, be rude, or roast her if she doesn’t reciprocate. 
Be genuine, natural, and clear. Also, accept fumbles gracefully. Don’t apply old formulas, tactics, or pick up lines. She’ll sense it.
If in dating apps like Tinder, maintain dignity and be well informed about her profile. If in any dating apps like Tinder, don’t send nudes or ask for it. Also, don’t use the same phrase for every girl. 
Make it simple, interesting, and witty. Avoid controversial topics like politics or religion.

Talking to women is an art. And now, it’s basics are covered. So, you are armed with all the important tips and ideas that are crucial to have a perfect conversation with a girl. 

BUT

What about some common situations which require a specific guide? Don’t worry, we have it here step by step. Let’s see!

How to Talk to Girls at Parties?

At any party, everyone is generally in a cheerful mood. Also, you get to meet a lot of new people. Thus, there is a smooth opportunity to talk to girls. So, try to make it light hearted and fun as per the mood!

26. Smile and Initiate

Smile is among the best conversation starters. Especially in a party situation where everyone is having fun. So, you can simply go there, give a friendly smile, and start. It works!

27. Introduce Yourself

No, not a formal introduction speech is needed. Just one line intro is more than enough. Of course, if she asks you more, you can give subtle information. That’s it. Don’t make it boring with a never-ending session about you.

28. See if She is in Group or Alone

Of course, this is quite relevant. Like, if she is in a group, you can greet others too. Or, ask them if you can join. Otherwise, it will be awkward for her if you only focus on her. 

If she is alone there, start greeting in a friendly way. Here, you have a better chance. You can compliment her, talk freely, or even ask for a dance. 

29. Get Her Signs

Pay attention to what she is trying to say… without saying. For instance, if she shows interest in you instantly or seems to be comfortable with you, then it’s a thumbs up for you. But if she is looking here and there, or trying to get away, leave it there. 

30. Be Witty while You Talk to a Girl

Girls love funny guys who make them laugh. And if you are among those gifted ones, don’t forget to use your skill! And suppose you are not sure about it. Then what? At least, keep it towards fun as much you can. When she is at a party, chances are high, she’d appreciate fun.

31. Have an Interesting Move

If you think she’s in a good mood and reciprocating well, you can have a better move. Like, you can ask her for a dance or offer for a drink. This way, you can eventually make it more interesting. Or, if she prefers talking, you can have her preferred topics on the table. 

32. Have a Right Departure

If things went smoothly and now it’s time to leave, make sure you utilize it at its fullest. That is, do it right in the end. Give her a final compliment. Tell her how much you enjoyed talking to her. 

Besides, you can smoothly ask for her number saying you’d love to be in touch with such an interesting person. If she really enjoyed your company, chances are high you will get it!

Now, the next one –

How to Talk to Girls on Tinder?

Online dating is fun. And talking to girls on a dating app is another ball game. If you don’t play it well, she’ll never respond or reciprocate. So, get it right –

33. Include Her Name in the First Text

Psychologically, we tend to subconsciously feel more comfortable with or trust someone who calls us by our name. And you can use it well while texting her. But no need to use her full name otherwise it will look too formal. Also, don’t overdo it by repeating her name in every next line.

34. Take it Light but Not Dry

While talking to her online, you should not sound too desperate. Your conversation should be light-hearted and cheerful. At the same time, don’t make it too dry with a rough ‘Hi’ only or in any such way. It should be comforting, exactly the way that shows your interest but not desperation.

35. Be Honest while Talking to Her

When you tell her that you own a Lamborghini or you’re having your band of musicians, make sure it is true. Otherwise, she will be confused and even annoyed when you will not be able to meet her expectations. So, keep it something that doesn’t kill her interest in you.

36. Check Her Profile before Talking to a Girl

Paying attention to her profile is crucial. By this, you will be able to ask the right questions or have a better chat. Also, it sounds really weird if after a 5-minute chat you suddenly go with – ‘I didn’t know you are interested in Hip-hop’ while her profile clearly shows it.

37. Be Creative or Witty and Engaging

Your first line can be the key factor of her interest in you. So, instead of a generic greeting or introduction, you can try something out of the box. 

And most of the time, being a bit creative or witty works. So, choose either way that you prefer. You can also try making it a bit flirty. The only point is to make it engaging.

38. Maintain Decency

It is very crucial. Don’t act like a creep, don’t use abusive language and DON’T send or ask for nudes. Obviously, these seem so very basic. And these are. But most of the time, people miss it as well as the chance to have the right conversation.

39. Ask for a Date

If your conversation on Tinder goes well and it seems like she is fine with you. Now, what next? Yes, take the move. For this, you can simply ask her about it. Or else, you can try a flirty or romantic way. Just don’t miss the opportunity.

Now…

How to Talk to a Girl You Like?

You like that girl for a long time and always feel like approaching her. But lose confidence or get clueless just at that moment? Well, follow these steps –

40. Break the Ice to talk to a Girl

Yes, it seems obvious. But you are not doing this obvious thing, right? So, just do it. Don’t overthink. Go to her, look into her eyes, give a friendly smile and say Hi. You can tell her how you think she’s an interesting girl and you’d like to talk to her. Just that… Keep it simple. 

41. Find about Her Interests

Obviously, you have developed a liking for her and this makes you interested in knowing more about her. So, take the initiative and do this. 

Hence, try to figure out her likes and dislikes. And then, include these into your conversation topics. This will make your conversation interesting to her.

42. Compliment Her while Talking to a Girl

To give a compliment to a girl, you need to have some skills. Didn’t get it? Actually, giving genuine compliments is important. For instance, if she has beautiful eyes or voice, tell her. If you think she’s smart, let her know. Basically, tell me what made you like her. BUT in proper words obviously.

43. Get Familiar

Now, it’s time to get her familiar with you. For this, often give her smiles. Greet her when you meet and have a normal conversation. Also, little by little, try to have common ground or interest. Like, if she’s fond of books, you may ask her for some recommendations or do the same. 

44. Make it Engaging while Talking to a Girl

When both of you are familiar with each other, try to keep the conversation flowing. For this, you can make it more interesting with the right questions, topics, jokes, etc. As, by now, both of you might have got a bit comfortable with each other.

45. Take it Forward Smoothly

Now, things seem straight. So, don’t get desperate or make fumbles. Keep it smooth. If she’s reciprocating well, it’s time to get a bit closer. Like, you can offer her coffee or maybe ask her if she’d like to come with you to a library or any such commonplace where her interest lies. 

46. Take it to the Next Step

If she accepts your proposals and you two are having some good time with each other, time is here! Yes. To take it to the next step, ask her for something more personal.

Like, maybe an invitation to a ball, or a candlelight dinner. And if she accepts it, confidently tell her about your feelings on the date. If it doesn’t work, laugh it off, give a smile, and let it pass. Simple.

It’s clear. Okay, the next step is –

How to Talk Dirty to a Girl?

So, she’s interested in you… And giving clear signs for the NEXT step! Well, then learn the art to arouse her with your spicy flirty banter –

47. Be Playful and Tactful while Talking Dirty to Her

First of all, you need to warm her up. And for this, give her some time as you slowly move forward. If you two are not THAT close yet, then move with light flirting. It can be like, ‘You’ve got beautiful lips… it’s taking all my attention ‘. 

And if she’s already close, say it like – ‘I think you have a perfect figure… can I measure it with my arms around?’. Just don’t be balant. Get her interest.

48. Start Well to Talk to a Girl

Now, you can’t just go there and ask her for it. She’ll instantly turn off and would think you a creep. So, give her time, arousing her, just the way you do in foreplay. For this, start simple and turn it into something arousing.

Like, if you ask her how she’s doing and she asks you the same, then go like – ‘Wasn’t that great until I saw you!’ And then gradually make it – ‘I was thinking about having some exciting time with a really sexy girl, you know…. Well, how would you know, I didn’t tell how sexy you are..’. 

49. Dive Deep while Talking Dirty to a Girl

Now, make it more interesting by getting a bit intimate with your words. You can offer to have a Truth or Dare, or Question Answer game. If she agrees, jump to something hot that will instantly excite her.

50. Offer Watching Erotic Movies or Reading such Novels Together

You can also ask her for a romantic movie or a book reading together. This will make the mood for both of you. Also, via this, you can make a confident move towards her as sexual tension arises between you two.

51. Let Her Visualize while Talking to Her

Now, when you two are comfortable and she’s getting warmed up, make the heat high. Remember – women are more imaginative. So, let her visualize it. Tell her how you’d love to hold her, how you want to hug her tight and eventually get it to the talks of bed…

52. Don’t Ruin it with a Taboo or Senseless Mention 

Well, just to remind, don’t make a stupid mistake when she’s at her peak. Sometimes, being compared to someone, listening to old-school toxic sexual stories, or too aggressive lines can make her mood off. Also, don’t say anything stupid in the illusion of a kink like – a threesome with her friend, etc. 

Now the plain one –

How to Talk to a Girl at the Gym?

Well, gym is a place you encounter many women. And sometimes, the place can give an apt space to make it enjoyable. Here’s your guide how –

53. Try to get your Workout Space Near Her 

So firstly, you need to be near her, right? So, get your workout space near her proximity. But it doesn’t mean that you have to follow her around the gym. This will make her disinterested. So, just maintain a natural proximity in respect to her.

54. Wait for the Right Moment

Now, look for the time when she seems free. Like, maybe when she’s stopping to have water or if she is taking some rest. It should not interrupt her work out anyway. Also, see her signs. Is she in a mood to talk to someone? What does her expression say?

55. Tell Her Something Relevant 

Now, you can’t go there to comment on the weather. So, look for a starter. You can ask her if she knows how to use a machine. Or, you can inform her about a change in the gym or maybe offer her some help. Just be friendly and clear.

56. Don’t Talk Too Much 

Make it simple and plain. Also, there is no point in starting a long rambling. Of course, she is there to work out. So, keep it crisp and short. Have light chats and then engage in your workout and let her do the same.

57. Move it Forward Smartly

Also, take it in a smart way. Like, you initiated. Now, time to maintain a flow. So, given her genuine smiles or greet her in the beginning and while leaving off. Gradually, start talking more comfortably as you both get familiar to each other. You can obviously then take to wherever you want if she is reciprocating well.

So, it is clear, isn’t it? Now time for…

How to Talk to a Girl over Text?

This is the generation of social media. This is why the question of ‘How to talk to a girl online?’ is more relevant today than ever before. And text messages play a vital part in this. So know how to do it –

58. Introduce or Initiate to Talk to a Girl

Start a conversation by a light friendly greeting. You can introduce yourself with the reference to the stance by which you know her. Like, if you met at a camping trip, mention it. 

59. Use a Friendly Tone with Light Emoticons

When you text a girl, it is important to maintain a decent voice. Thus, avoid swearing words. Just maintain a cheerful tone. Also, be wise while using emoticons. Don’t use intense ones like hugging, kissing, or hearts unless you two are really close. 

60. Make it Interesting and Humorous

Have a great sense of humor? Then utilize it to make the conversation engaging. Also, along with the text conversations, you can send her any funny youtube video, etc. that makes her happy and enjoy the chat with you. 

61. Don’t Be Too Obvious

Of course, you want to talk to her. But don’t be too obvious in its expression. So, don’t chat just for the sake of it. Instead, find something common in you two and go via it. It should be natural, in short.

62. Make it Simple while Talking to a Girl

No point in texting some deep quotes or full paragraphs in the name of deep conversation. This will make her get bored. So, keep it simple, crisp, and relevant. 

63. Don’t Ignore or Overdo

As already said, you should be friendly. So, don’t be too desperate by sending so many messages at a time or by messaging too frequently. At the same time, don’t ignore her messages. This doesn’t work like a chase game. If she’d feel being ignored, most probably she’ll leave it. 

64. Give Some Hints

If things are getting well and you two are chatting for quite some time, you can try getting ahead. For this, you can give subtle hints like trying light flirting, etc. If she is interested, she will reciprocate in it.

Lastly –

How to Start Talking to a Girl?

As it is said – the first impression is the last impression. Hence, starting a conversation with a girl for the first time in a perfect way is crucial. Here’s how you can do it –

65. Approach Her Right

While approaching a girl, it is a good idea to start with something interesting or creative. Of course, you can begin with a genuine introduction or a greeting. Just don’t make it a cliche or boring.

66. Find the Common and Make it Interesting

Good conversations are the ones where you have something in common. A TV show, a favorite movie, an interesting hobby or a career choice – it can be anything. Basically, direct your conversation towards getting this common ground among you two.

67. Read Her Signs while Talking to a Girl

While talking to her, keep an eye on what she is trying to express. Like, if she finds your company interesting, her feet would be towards you. If she is trying to get away, her position will be away from you. This can guide you if you should continue or not. 

68. Listen while Talking to a Girl

Great conversation is the one when both of you really listen to each other. So, be a good listener. Respond well to her words. This will encourage her to talk to you freely. 

69. Ask Her right Questions

You can go through a list of questions or maybe some ‘get to know’ ones to have an idea of what to ask. In this way, you will not fumble or will go out of words while talking to her. Just make sure the questions should not sound like an interrogation.

70. Ask for a Next Talk

If you think that she genuinely enjoyed talking to you, it’s probably the right time to ensure your next talk. You can simply ask her if she’d be convenient to have a chat over the phone or in a meeting. Ask it in a light way. And even if she refuses, let it pass in a light way.

That’s all. Now, here are the final points that can save you from many unwanted situations. 

How To Talk To A Girl for The First Time Face To Face


Now let’s say you don’t have her number but you get to meet her or you are meeting a girl at a party for the first time and you wish to initiate a conversation then what do you do?

Face to face conversations may seem difficult but they are not time taking like text messages. You also get to see the other person’s facial expressions which sometimes say more than words. Here are a few tips to follow to make face to face conversation easy for you –  

71. Pay attention and listen carefully

Pay attention and listen carefully
Pay attention and listen carefully

We all like to be heard, don’t we? If you don’t pay attention or your body language is not attentive, it can be a big disappointment for her.

Make sure you listen to what she has to say. Ask her questions about whatever she is talking about. Show that you are taking an interest in her life or in her stories. 

72. Do not cut her short 

Do not cut her short
Do not cut her short

Some men don’t pay attention and interrupt while the other person is talking. Make sure you don’t do this. Start talking after she is done talking.

This is another very disappointing factor for girls. Let her finish what she has to say. Her stories can be long sometimes but so can be yours. You wouldn’t like to see someone cutting you short. 

73. Make her feel comfortable 

Make her feel comfortable
Make her feel comfortable

Your body language or gestures shouldn’t make her feel uncomfortable. It is really important to make her feel safe and comfortable.

It is only when she is comfortable, she will be her real self. She will be able to have an honest conversation with you if you make her feel respected, heard and comfortable. 

74. Be okay with silence 

Be okay with silence
Be okay with silence

Some men think that it is important to continue talking to not have a moment of awkward silence. However, one must realize that silence is good, sometimes.

It is not required to always fill the silence with some random words. You should learn to be comfortable with silence. Make her feel comfortable with silence with your gestures and body language. Make sure the silence doesn’t feel awkward. 

75. Ask her about her thoughts and opinions 

Ask her about her thoughts and opinions
Ask her about her thoughts and opinions

It is one thing to know about one’s hobbies and it’s another to ask about their thoughts, feelings, ideas, and opinions. Some women absolutely enjoy talking about what they feel about various things.

In fact, they don’t like small talk. Talking about intense things can also make your conversations interesting. When you make her feel heard, she starts to see the spark. If don’t show interest in any of her thoughts, then she might lose interest in you. 

76. Show her your humorous side

Show her your humorous side
Show her your humorous side

One can’t always be serious. If you can talk about serious things and issues with her then you also have to show your sense of humor to her. A good laugh is always important in any kind of relationship.

It eases out any kind of situation and makes the person have a good and memorable time. It also helps in creating good memories which in turn connects you well with the other person.

You don’t have to be excessively funny to make her laugh. You can just be your own self and say some of the things that you find funny. Don’t worry too much about her reaction. 

77. Always be honest 

Always be honest
Always be honest

Lies are not acceptable, quite simply. Girls appreciate honesty. You don’t have to lie to impress her. Do not lie about anything.

Be transparent and honest with her. If you don’t want to talk about something at a particular time, you can mention this to her instead of telling her lies. Lies are a trap. Once you start speaking one, you have to tell many more to cover up.

It is better to not fall into this trap. It can ruin all your positive efforts. 

78. Tell her about yourself 

Tell her about yourself
Tell her about yourself

You have asked her about her hobbies, thoughts, and ideas. Further, you have also exchanged some laughs with her but does she know enough about you? You don’t want to come across as someone mysterious.

Talk about your family, friends, work, and interests. Share with her some of the interesting stories from your life that you think are engaging. When you share these details with her, she feels like you are really opening up to her.

She is very likely to appreciate that. Make sure it’s not just you speaking the whole time. Take pauses. 

Points to Keep in Mind while Talking to a Girl

So, you are done with the ‘How to Talk to Girls?’ guide. Thus, quickly go through these final reminders –

  1. Avoid harmful masculinity or being too dominating. 
  2. Don’t swear or use cuss words a lot. That is, no vulgar comments, stares, etc. It feels uncomfortable.
  3. Avoid negging or other such formulas.
  4. Avoid controversial topics like politics and religion. 
  5. It’s BOTH of you. So, if you think you are feeling ignored or humiliated any way, this is not even worth it.

Now, you are done with EVERYTHING you need. So, apply it in real life. 

Your Turn!

This ‘How to talk to girls’ guide can actually help you in learning the art. But remember – there is never one recipe to impress a girl. Also, there are no shortcuts or guarantees. However, if you take care of a few things, remain your truest self, be respectful and honest, then you do not need to hesitate. 

In real life, talking to girls is not THAT big deal. Nor are the rejections. For a healthy interaction and bond, accept this and move ahead!