We all feel angry at some point in time. It’s a human emotion that arises at varying degrees. Atlas of Emotions designed by Dr. Paul Ekman also identifies anger as a universal emotion. With sadness, disgust, fear, and enjoyment, anger is also common in every individual. Amidst this, we never realize that to hide certain emotions, we take the help of anger. And that’s why anger is a secondary emotion. So, with this article, we are going to explore about anger as a secondary emotion and its successful management.
How anger becomes a secondary emotion?
In this competitive life, some wishes do stay unfulfilled. Some are next to impossible while some we tend to avoid. And this leads to disappointment, frustration, anxiety and sometimes stress. These emotions that come before anger are called primary emotions. But sometimes, people are vulnerable or uncomfortable to exhibit these emotions. They try their best to avoid these feelings. And they unknowingly shift to an angry mode. They feel anger gives them the power to fight back to things that demean them. And so, anger is a secondary emotion that represses all the above-mentioned emotions. Moreover, if you think you are feeling angry, then watch out for these signs.
7 Common Signs of Anger
- Change in voice
- Tensed body
- Deep or fast breathing
- Unkind words
6 Anger Management Tips to Deal with Anger
1) Stay Calm
It’s wise to express your frustration. But it doesn’t mean it has to be harsh. You can positively emote unhappiness too! Because anger will break down your peace.
Now that you know the signs of anger. So, as soon as you start getting these symptoms, try to stay calm. Start counting numbers till 10 to control your anger. Once you are calm, positively express your views. Whatever concerns you may have, state them clearly but without hurting anybody.
2) Identify solutions
Instead of revisiting moments that cause anger. It’s wise to design solutions. Revisiting your anger moments will give you more temperament. And problem-solving may become difficult.
We are now aware that anger is a secondary emotion. So, instead of thinking about the primary emotion, think about solutions. If your partner is late for dinner more often. Then start eating alone regularly. Do not stretch the issue because it may lead to disappointment.
Anger is not the solution to every problem. Instead of fixing an issue, it may make it worse.
3) Take up physical exercise
Time and again, physical exercises have proved their worth for suppressing stress. And stress is one of the primary emotions that leads to anger. So, indulge in fun activities to take time-off from hectic life and anger.
Whenever you think, your anger is at a peak. Then go for a quick brisk walk or run to calm your body down. A study has reflected that exercise is a great medium to keep anger at bay. You may also indulge in a light activity like gardening which will help in lifting your mood.
4) Take a break for yourself
Repetitive life and repetitive tasks add to a monotonous lifestyle. And this causes discomfort and anger. So, before letting anger enter your life. It’s wise to take a break from things that disturb you.
We give regular timeouts to kids when they feel stressed. The same rule applies to adults too. Every individual needs to take a break from a stressful life. In due course, anger is a secondary emotion of stress. A few moments of serenity will help you think wisely. And keep you away from things that irritate you. You may plan a trip with your loved ones to stay away from mundane life.
5) Think before commenting
Anger is a big hurdle while problem-solving. It doesn’t help you to draw a positive conclusion. It also motivates revenge thus forcing an angry person to blabber bad things. So, feel the anger but do not act upon it.
Anger is one such emotion that makes you comment without thinking. This furthermore leads to regretful feeling and uneasiness. So, isn’t it simple to not say inappropriate things? So, when your anger is at its peak, avoid saying anything. And even if you wish to, then take a pause and think. Take this time to collect thoughts. Also, give time to others who are involved in the situation.
Be a good listener because it will help you manage anger in the best possible way. Listen to what others are saying before going in an ‘outrage’ mode.
6) Forgive and forget
Thinking about the same situation, infuses a sense of anger. It also affects your relationship with your loved ones. So, forgive and forget the situation that leads to unhappiness.
Forgiveness is a very powerful tool for suppressing anger. Because once involved in negativity, then there are chances of getting consumed in bitterness. So, it’s always better to move on. If someone has angered you, then don’t hold a grudge for a longer duration. It will affect your relationship. Instead, forgive so that you can strengthen the relationship and learn from your mistakes.
Feeling angry is quite natural. But controlling it and realizing anger is a secondary emotion is very important. So, do implement these simple but useful tips for productive anger management. And do let us know which tip helped you the most in controlling your anger!
Neelambari started her rollercoaster ride as a journalist at Pune Mirror (Times Group). After which she started exploring the world of content writing. Today, she boasts more than five years of experience filled with creativity and diversity. During this tenure, she explored various mediums like articles, blogs, social media posts, website content, and much more. And this content ranged from Gynecology, Ayurveda, Dental health to nutrition. However, she enjoys the most writing about Psychology and other medical streams. She loves writing and aims to bring positive changes at least in some lives with her articles on www.themindfool.com